Two Ears One Mouth

Don't worry, soon I'll be back on a training plan and will be able to actually post about the things I really like to talk about. Well, at least the things I think I'm good at talking about. Training and racing is what makes me human. It's the one thing I feel that I have total control of (even though occasional injuries like to make me think otherwise) and it's my happy place. My pain cave is dark but there's great music in there. source Anyway, the point of today's blog is to talk about how to handle that pesky inferiority complex. I don't know if any of you are like me but I have a hard time recognizing my own accomplishments. I had this discussion with Miss Jessica the other day: Me:  She makes me sad that she's so hard on herself Jess:  I'm pretty sure you're that hard on yourself in some ways, so there's something to think about Me:  I'm not THAT hard on myself Jess:  Maybe not hard, but I feel like you get disap...

Do you ever just wake up, take a big breath of fresh air and feel totally grateful to be alive? Ok, so I don't. But I also don't wake up wishing I hadn't anymore and that is certainly something to be grateful for. You see, I went through a very long, very dark phase in my life where every day was not a blessing, I couldn't enjoy a pretty day and I begged the earth to swallow me whole. I had things on the horizon and did a pretty damn good job of faking every normal human emotion so no one knew what was going on. The only one I didn't have fooled was myself and unfortunately at that time, mine was the only voice I heard and the only opinion that mattered. Without going into detail I'll just say that there was a point when I hit rock bottom. And as I sat there and finally felt solid ground under me I realized that I was no longer falling. What was more important was I realized the true benefit of rock bottom, the ability to put your feet on the ground. When I ...

See what I did there?  As everyone else is discussing the long weekend I went with discussing my long run. Oh Marathin Monster. You have consumed my entire being. After a very successful Track Tuesday I sat on the couch never to run again. That's a lie. But I didn't run again the rest of the week. Saturday the plan was to hit the always scary 16 mile mark for the long run. Why I had such a hard time getting out of bed I will never know. But I peeled myself from bed, stumbled along in the dark cursing as I stepped on random bits of things (wood floors hold a tremendous amount of debris) and made it to the kitchen for breakfast. Close to 7am Autumn sent me the text I always secretly wish she will send saying she couldn't run. I was disappointed initially but upon letting my dog outside and closing the door sweating I didn't feel too bad about the decision to skip. I tried to lay back down on the couch but no real luck falling asleep so I got on Facebook to see a post...

Hey friends! Im joining you from my borrowed iPad this evening! There is a resident at work who gets to use one in dialysis and insists on calling it an I-p-a-d saying each letter instead of by its Apple approved name. It is adorable. Since I typically try to keep things positive here in the vile I haven't been blogging much because I haven't been feeling particularly positive. Aside from the engagement not many good things have been happening so since I had almost nothing nice to say I took the oath of silence. If you aren't a close friend of mine who has had to hear my cries you should thank me. In the interest of positivity, here are 10 positive things I can think of right now: 1. Today was my day off and it was spent almost entirely on the couch. 2. I have jobs to have occasional days off from. 3. I'm still engaged and my ring is still pretty. 4. I'm already within 7 pounds of my end of summer weight loss goal. 5. I have a meeting with my top wedding...