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"Jealousy is all the fun you think they had"

"Jealousy is all the fun you think they had..." is quite possibly the best quote I've heard in a long time. I've never heard it before today but it will for now on be something I'll try to remind myself of. I spend SO MUCH TIME as an outsider. I look at people laughing and at facebook pictures and at reality tv and see people just having the time of their lives, living these lavish lifestyles. People who don't suck at their jobs, who are using their degrees, who are capable of just being grateful for things like getting a bouquet of flowers instead of being mad that they cost too much money (even if they did in fact cost too much)...

This post has taken me a really long time to write. During my drive home I was thinking of what I wanted to write about tonight to distract my mind from the fact that my car allegedly needs more than $600 worth of maintenance and is sort of like driving with a funnel cloud directly over you that serves as a constant reminder of impending doom and at any moment could swoop down and wreak all sorts of havoc on my life and thought to myself how brave I was for being willing to share these things about myself. But now I'm realizing that I'm a chicken. No more chicken than anyone else maybe but much too chicken to share what I'm thinking and/or feeling. Until next time...

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